


The Blackbird and the Phoenix.

by Imisslexa



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Garcia tries to set up her friends, Henry is super supportive, M/M, Moreid on the side, Morgan and Emily Brotp, Mutual Pining, Reid is adorable, Rossi is everyones dad, They both think they're feelings are unrequited, Will isn't bad, but he isn't good, gay idiots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:55:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26033785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imisslexa/pseuds/Imisslexa
Summary: With all the walls Emily had up, it had caught her by surprise when she realized, all those years ago, she was falling for one Jennifer Jareauor Emily and JJ are both in love but neither knows.
Relationships: Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid, Jennifer "JJ" Jareau/Emily Prentiss, Penelope Garcia/Kevin Lynch
Comments: 16
Kudos: 148





	1. I only have you in dreams so does that make life a nightmare

**Author's Note:**

> I hated that Jemily never happened so I'm writing this. First fanfic.

When Emily woke up, she glanced over at her alarm clock. It read 3:46. She groaned, realizing she could have slept in another 3 hours. She was especially disappointed that whatever woke her, had dragged her from a particularly pleasant dream involving a blonde coworker. After inwardly cursing herself for thinking about her best friend that way, she begrudgingly left the comfort of her bed and took a long, cold shower. After she finished, Emily walked into her bedroom and found a red button-up and threw a black blazer over it, finishing off the outfit with a pair of slacks. She thought about what to do with the remaining two and a half hours she had before she had to arrive at work. She decided she would take a long walk to a nearby park and clear her head. As usual, Emily’s mind drifted to a certain media liaison and surprisingly enough, the brunette decided not to push them down this time. With all the walls Emily had up, it had caught her by surprise when she realized, all those years ago, she was falling for one Jennifer Jareau. She decided not to let it affect the close relationship she had with JJ. Their friendship meant much more to her than some silly crush. 

As she sat down on a cold park bench, she thought about William LaMontagne jr. Precisely how someone so plain and basic had ended up with someone as extraordinary as Jennifer. But alas, Will was a good man who loved JJ wholeheartedly, and she loved him back. JJ was happy with him, and her happiness was Emily’s main priority. 

Emily checked her watch and saw that she should start heading back to her loft. She started walking, facing the brisk, chilly wind of the November air. It didn’t get too cold in Quantico, but it wasn’t exactly warm either. She slid the key into the lock and heard the metallic click of the door opening. She grabbed her purse and badge. Then she walked up the spiral stairs and into her bedroom. Emily walked over to the safe that held her departmentally issued gun, a Sig Sauer P226. She looked at the Letter lock that kept the door closed and spun the dial. First to B, then to the L continuing on to the A-C-K-B-I-R-D. She thought about that night on the plane when JJ suggested that she turn the scar on her chest into a blackbird tattoo. She knew, on her way to Paris, that she was leaving her friends, the people who had become her family, but if Emily could only have one person, she was glad it was JJ. Emily didn’t think she could live without JJ, even if it were only through online scrabble. 

On her way to work, Emily stopped by Starbucks to get a cup of coffee. While she waited in line, she remembered JJ’s coffee order and decided to get her a cup as well. As she walked into the bullpen, she locked eyes with Morgan; he gave her a soft smile and a nod. He was sitting on her desk, debating something with Spencer. She walked over and placed her coffee on her desk while scanning the bullpen for JJ. 

“Yum. Is that for me,” Derek said as he made a motion to grab the second cup.  
“No. It’s for her,” Emily says while slapping away Derek’s hand while jutting her chin toward the Media Liaison’s office.  
“Ooo. Does somebody have a crush?” Derek teased in a sing-song voice, putting extra emphasis on the U in crush. She rolled her eyes, doing her best not to blush because Morgan’s joke was unfortunately not wrong. Although one could argue, her feelings for the blonde were much more profound than a simple crush.

“Didn’t you bring Reid lunch last Wednesday,” asked Emily with a sly smirk on her face. Reid and Morgan’s obvious feelings for each other were painful to watch, especially since both men were oblivious to the other’s infatuation. Derek was now the one to turn red, his cheeks contrasting against his usually dark skin tone. He quickly glanced over at Spencer, who was looking anywhere else but the 2 of them, before immediately looking back at Emily.

“Whatever. You seriously need to get your shit together and talk to her. Will be damned,” Derek said. Emily was about to state the irony of the statement when Reid interrupted her.

“85% of affairs begin in the workplace with coworkers,” Spencer awkwardly remarked, his gaze still wandering around the room. Morgan opened his mouth, about to state the inappropriateness of the statistic but decided against it. Emily, on the other hand, was still trying to comprehend what Reid had just said. Did Reid think that JJ would cheat on Will with her? Did he think she should? He probably only didn’t realize the impact of the words he had said to her. 

“Yeah. Thanks, Reid,” She said as she briskly walked to the blonde’s office. 

She knocked on the open door. JJ’s head snapped up from the overflowing pile of files stacked on her desk. She was wearing a gray sweater and tight blue jeans that hugged her legs in all the right ways. She smiled when she saw Emily. Emily gave a quick smile back and made her way to the edge of the desk and put the coffee down on the corner. JJ’s face lit up at the sight of the beverage. She brought the cup up to her lips and took a long sip. Her eyes closed in delight. 

“Wow. Thanks, Em. This coffee is fantastic. I definitely need it. Henry decided to fight bedtime last night so not much sleep,” JJ said with a chuckle. JJ took notice of Emily’s clothing choice. She was wearing red. JJ liked it when Emily wore red. She thinks back to when Emily wore a red tank top during one, particularly sticky Virginia summer. She had found it quite challenging to concentrate on anything other than Emily’s toned arms and exposed chest.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Will didn’t help?” She asked. She didn’t want to know. Emily was pretty sure that the answer was something about how Will was working or how he did help but to no avail despite him being a great dad. Emily had heard numerous stories of how amazing of a father Will was. But instead, the blonde usually’s chipper demeanor flickered. Her smile faltered, and Emily could have sworn she saw a look of hurt cross the younger woman’s face. 

“No, he was uh, busy,” JJ lied. The truth was, Will was far too drunk even to notice Henry up past his bedtime. Emily decided she would over-analyze the conversation when she got home, but for now, JJ would have her undivided attention. 

“Oh, okay. Well, Garcia planned a girl’s night for Thursday. Can I expect you?” Emily said, quirking her eyes brows a small smile planted on her face.

“I wouldn’t miss it. Text me the details?” JJ responded, grinning at the prospect of a night out with her friends. 

“Of course,"

“And Em,” JJ says as she places a hand on Emily’s to keep her from leaving just yet. She runs her thumb over Emily’s, which sends a jolt through Emily’s entire body. “Thank you again for the coffee. It really was perfect.


	2. Penelope is happy to be a third wheel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have not yet decided whether I like Will in this sooooo... enjoy

JJ woke to the feeling of Henry jumping on her and Will’s bed. Will jumped up, grabbed Henry, and spun him around. He laughed his beautiful, infectious laugh. This life may not be perfect, but it’s not terrible. She might not have Emily, but she had Henry. He brought absolute joy to the blonde’s life that she just couldn’t describe with English words. Maybe Emily could explain it with the thousand different languages she seemed to know, though JJ, her mind drifting off to the brunette as always. 

“Mommy! Mommy!” Henry pleaded excitedly. “You promised to make chocolate pancakes with me,” 

“Yeah yeah. Ok buddy, let’s go do that,” JJ said with a laugh.

“Yaayyyy,” Henry squealed in delight. They all got up and walked into the kitchen to make breakfast. Will walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. She couldn’t help but grimace. 

“You okay, Cher,” Will drawled in his New Orleans accent. 

“Yeah. Fine. I just need to use the bathroom,” Lied JJ. She hated hating Will. he was a good man but not the right one for her, and she had no idea how to tell him. He was a great father and the best boyfriend she had ever had. 

“Listen, Jayje; I’m sorry about the other night. A couple of friends from New Orleans were in town, and you know how it’s a tradition to drink ourselves under the table,” Will explained.

“Yeah, it’s okay,” JJ replied. He smiled and kissed her. She barely kissed him back. She didn’t even close her eyes, but he didn’t seem to notice. She walked back to there room, sat down on the bed, and closed her eyes. Her mind swarmed with all the thoughts of a life she could have with Emily and Henry. The world seemed so unfair to her. She thought back to that night in Miami. 

_ “You should go for him,” she said to JJ. Emily hoped she didn’t. She wanted JJ to turn around and kiss her right there. But if JJ went to Will, at least Emily would have something to keep her from doing something she’d regret.  _

_ “What?” JJ said, startled. Did Emily want her with Will? Did Emily not want her? _

_ “You’d make a cute couple,” Emily lied through her teeth. She was testing JJ. If she went for the southern detective, then she didn’t want Emily. Her stomach churned with the possibilities.  _

_ “You know what,” JJ ran to catch up with Will. She gave some half-assed speech about her being scared and kissed him. She convinced herself that when she pursued a relationship with him, her feelings for the brunette would dissipate. Spoiler alert. They didn't. _

_ “Finally,” Derek said. Spencer said something as well, but the hurt and torment she was feeling drowned it out. She couldn’t stand there. She couldn't watch this. Emily walked outside as tears pricked her eyes. If it really was a test for JJ, a disguised question, then she had gotten the blonde's, answer whether she liked it or not. She took a seat on a bench when she realized Derek had followed her.  _

_ “Hey, princess,” He said as he sat down. He gave her a small smile, and his eyes softened.  _

_ “You don’t need to look at me like that. I’ll be fine.” Emily lied. She would be far from fine. This moment might haunt her for the rest of her life, but she wasn’t about to tell Morgan that.  _

_ “Well. We are in Miami. What do you say we grab a drink and talk about how fine you’ll be?” requested Morgan with a kind look on his face. _

_ “Yeah, okay. That sounds kinda nice,” _

JJ’s phone yanked her from her thoughts when it buzzed on her nightstand. She picked it up, and instantly her heart seemed to beat out of her chest. It was from Emily, and it read- _my place. 7:30. I got the wine._ She smiled, got dressed, and walked back out into the kitchen. 

“Hey, Jay,” Will said with pancake batter splattered on his t-shirt. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I’ve got a night with girls. I’m going to leave around 7:15,” she said 

“Really. I mean I could use some help tonight,” 

“And I could have used some help on Tuesday. You owe me one Will,”

“You said it was fine!” Will exclaimed raising his voice

“And it was. Just let me have this,” JJ pleaded. She didn’t want to fight in front of Henry. 

“You should have told me earlier,” Will said, calming down.

“Your right. I’m sorry,” JJ practically whispered.

The rest of the day came and went. They took Henry to preschool. Will went to work, and JJ stopped by the office to grab some files. She was supposed to have today and tomorrow off, but she always felt unaccomplished if she didn’t do any work. When 7:00 rolled around, JJ threw on a blue blouse and a pair of jeans. She kissed Henry goodnight and went to grab some take out from an Italian place she knew Emily loved. Finally, she pulled up to Emilys building and saw Garcia’s car already parked out front. She went in and hit the elevator button for her loft. Before she even knocked on the door, JJ could hear the laughs of Penelope and Emily. When she hit her fist against the door, the blonde could hear shuffling before the brunette appeared at the door in her civilian clothes. JJ enjoyed seeing this domestic side of her. Emily smiled and pulled JJ in for a hug. She smelled like coconut, lavender, and something foreign she couldn't quite put her finger on. It was unique to Emily, and JJ loved it.

“I brought take out,” JJ said with a smile as she held up the white grocery bag.

“You didn’t have to. Thank you, though. Where are my manners come in,” Emily said as she stepped aside and let JJ into her apartment. Garcia was sitting on the couch with a glass of wine. Emily handed JJ a drink and picked up her own. As they sat down, their thighs brushed across each other, and they felt an immediate rush of emotion. 

“So, what are we watching?” Pen piped up

“I was thinking about maybe Carol. I love Cate Blanchette.” Emily responded

“Oh, I love that movie,” JJ said, “I mean, Cate Blanchette is excellent in everything. Whether its Carol, Thor Ragnarok, or Oceans 8.” They decided to go on a Cate Blanchette marathon. Emily and JJ seemed to move closer to each other more and more throughout the night until JJ was practically lying on top of Emily, with the older woman’s fingers running through her hair. While the two women cuddling didn’t seem to notice there more than friendly touching, Garcia was not oblivious. 

But their happiness couldn’t last. At around 11:30, all three of the girls’ phones rang, which could only mean one thing. 

“It’s Hotch,” JJ said first, sitting up. Emily was slightly disappointed at the loss of contact. 

“I’m assuming we need to go in,” stated Emily 

“Sorry, guys,” JJ apologized, “duty calls.” 

“Where is it?” Pen asked, “The case, I mean.” she clarified

  
  


Emily headed up to her room to grab her go-bag. JJ was about to follow her when Penelope grabbed her arm.

“Listen, sweetness. You and Will are adorable, but you can’t keep pushing down your feelings for Emily,” Penelope said in a hushed whisper.

“Pen I... I don’t know what you’re talking about,” JJ defended

“You should talk to her, and if you don’t, I’ll start meddling.” she threatened with a playful wink. Questions plagued JJ’s mind. Was she actually being that obvious? Did Garcia think Emily loved her as much she loved Emily? Who else knew? Did she think she should break-up with Will? She had so many questions and concerns, but before she could voice any of them, Emily had materialized behind the girls.

“I got my go-bag. Do you need to get your stuff JJ? I can cover for you with Hotch,” Emily offered.

“No. I keep one in the car. Thanks, anyway,” She responded, “I have to call Will though.” JJ pulled her phone out of her back pocket and dialed her boyfriend’s number.

“Hey, Jay. Is everything okay?” He asked when he picked up.

“Yeah, I’m okay. I have to go to Washington for a case, though,”

“Seriously,” Will was upset. This conversation was not going to be fun. “Cher, I’ve been thinking. What if we moved to New Orleans.” JJ went silent. Her anger started to bubble inside of her. 

“I’m not quitting my job, Will,” she whispered angrily, not wanting her coworkers to here.

“We shouldn’t both be in the field. It’s dangerous. You have to remember Henry.” 

“I do everything I do  **for** Henry,” she said with her voice raised. Penelope glanced over at her but didn’t say anything. “I’m not having this conversation right now. I have to go, Will.” JJ said sternly.

“Everything all right?” Emily questioned softly. Her comforting brown eyes said more than her words ever could. JJ gave her a tight smile before she exhaled a breath she didn’t realize she was holding. 

“Will wants me to quit my job and move to New Orleans with him,” Emily tried to keep her feelings inside, but the blonde could read the emotions that crossed the face of the brunette. There was the surprise first and then a flash of hurt and fear. 

“Are you going to do it?” Emily asked her as she put all of her walls back up, her face expressionless.

“What no. Of course not. I could never do that. You guys are my family,” She exclaimed, “I could never leave you.” she murmured under her breath so quietly, Emily wasn’t sure she heard it. Garcia had stayed surprisingly quiet during the entire ordeal. That is until now.

“Awww. I love you guys to,” the analyst gushed as she enveloped the other two women in a hug.

“We should get going if we don’t want to piss off Hotch,” Emily stated awkwardly, breaking the hug. They all drove to the BAU and arrived at around midnight. As they entered the briefing room they saw Reid and Rossi already there and watched Morgan walk in. Morgan and Reid exchanged a tight smile before Hotch gathered everyone's attention.

“Sorry for interrupting any plans, but we have a bad one in Sequim, Washington,” Hotch said solemnly, “We’ll debrief on the plane. Wheels up in twenty.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you tell I like Cate Blanchette;)  
> Anyways thanks for reading.


	3. I'll fight your demons even if they're me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Disclaimer* Mentions of Rosalyn in this chapter. There are also somewhat graphic descriptions of violence and a panic attack. So if any of this would trigger you, stop reading at "She crawled into her bed and snuggled under the covers inviting sleep to take her." and start reading again at “Can you stay with me while I sleep?”

“Our unsub is forcing young boys to kill their mothers,” Hotch said as soon as everyone gathered on the plane. Emily felt JJ tense next to her. She immediately realized that this case was going to hit close to home for the younger agent because, after all, she had a young son back home. She felt a rush of courage and reached down to grab JJ’s had just as she had done that night in the hospital when an unsub had shot Garcia. The blonde accepted her hand quickly and squeezed it tight. “Let’s start with victimology,” Hotch lead the meeting.

“So the unsub sees these women as surrogates for a woman that wronged him,” Rossi states in a matter of fact tone. “They all have long dark hair, brown eyes, similar build and they all have children. Whoever our guy is, hates women, probably because of his mother.” They all knew he was right, but only JJ and Morgan seemed to notice that the description of the victims matched Emily perfectly. 

“So we know that they are a male. Probably twenty-five to forty years old,” Reid chimed in. “All of the victims are caucasian, so our unsub probably is as well.”

“They were all killed in their homes so he might be using a ruse to get the families to let them into their home. He probably also stalked the houses because he knew that a single mother and her son lived there,” added Emily. They went about the rest of the plane ride discussing separate points in the case. 

When the team finally touched down at the airport, it was another 2-hour drive to the small town. They arrived at their motel. The BAU always cut corners whenever they could, which included the temporary residence they took up across the country. So unsurprisingly, they had to pair up for the rooms. Emily and JJ shared a knowing glance and already knew they would share a place. Later that night, Emily caught JJ staring at an open file. She looked over the younger woman’s shoulder and saw photos of young women, all shot with the same .22 LR; blood splattered on the family photos and pictures of the forever traumatized boys who had their mothers stripped from their lives.

“Hey. You don’t need to keep looking at those. Don’t beat yourself up, Jayje.” Emily comforted with a soft feel to her voice. That was always something JJ loved about the older agent. Her demeanor could go from piercing, cold, and calculating to compassionate, caring, and humorous depending on the person. The blonde usually receiving the latter. 

“Yeah, okay,” JJ agreed she looked up into those beautiful brown eyes, and all her emotions came spilling out. “I just can’t stop thinking about him,” she choked out with a strangled sob. Emily’s heart shattered at the sight of someone so beautiful seem so broken. She enveloped the younger agent into a tight embrace and murmured small reassurances to the blonde. 

“Hey, hey, hey. Henry is okay. He’s safe. His mom is in the FBI, his dad is a cop, and he has four uncles in the FBI and two aunts. Nobody is going to fuck with that kid, okay. You're safe too. I’m not going to let anything happen to you or him,” the words kept pouring out of Emily’s mouth, and JJ had never felt such comfort and safety like she did in the taller woman’s arms. She let out one more shaky breath before shifting to look up at Emily. Emily was startled by the sudden movement but looked down at JJ. 

“What did I ever do to deserve you, Em?” She questioned with a weak laugh as her watery, electric blue eyes found Emily's calm chestnut ones. She glanced down at the lips of the woman in her arms and bit her bottom lip. Emily didn’t say anything, but in her eyes, JJ deserved the world. 

“Take a break from the case. We should get some sleep,” Emily said, standing up. JJ suddenly missed the taller woman’s arms. “I’m gonna take a shower.” Emily walked into the bathroom and turned on the water. She let the near-boiling water run over her body while she thought about the day's events. She was still appalled by the fact that Will had asked JJ to quit her job. Emily couldn’t be happier that JJ was staying; after all, she loved JJ. Emily loved JJ despite her flaws. She was enamored by how passionate JJ was. She loved her determination and the fire that light in her blue eyes every time she set her mind to something. She loved that whenever JJ read, she drummed the back of the book mindlessly. 

Back in the central part of the motel room, JJ was having a similar conversation with herself as she thought back to the night she realized she loved Emily. It had been over five years ago after a particularly rough case. 

_ “I think it’s a good idea, though,” JJ finally said.  _

_ “What’s that,” Emily said, confused.  _

_ “You. Kids.” The thought had been running around in JJ’s mind for some time. Emily put up a good facade of being a badass with no emotions, but JJ could see how kind and nurturing she was under the surface. Emily smiled, but inside she was wondering whether or not she would be fit to be a mother. JJ could tell the woman in front of didn’t realize the sincerity of her words so she continued, “I can see it,”  _

_ “Yeah?” Emily questioned, finally letting the blonde’s words sink in. She nodded and let out a quiet, “yeah.” JJ stood up and sat down next to Emily. They talked and laughed the entire plane ride as they flew back to Virginia, moving closer to each other as the night carried on. JJ came to understand that Emily, despite her elegance, charm, and vast accomplishments, was an awkward nerd. And it was adorable. Emily found herself falling asleep on the younger agent’s shoulder as sleep consumed her. JJ couldn’t help but admire her. Since the first day that JJ saw Emily standing in Hotch’s office, she had become fixated with the new agent. Every day she would learn something new and incredible about her. Emily spoke so many languages and was so well-traveled and cultured. JJ initially thought her feelings for the brunette were merely platonic admiration with a hint of intimidation. That night, she realized her emotions, where much more robust and more complicated.  _

Soon her growing exhaustion pulled her from her memories, and JJ found herself shuffling to her bed on the far side of the room. She collapsed on top of it and was asleep within minutes. 

Emily turned off the water and dried off with the motel towel. She scanned the bathroom for a change of clothes when she realized that she forgot to bring them with her. She wrapped the towel around her shivering body and poked her head out of the bathroom door. 

“Hey Jayje could you-,” Emily stopped when she saw the blond curled up on her bed. She couldn’t help but smile at the sight. I warmed her heart to see JJ look so peaceful. She dropped her towel, knowing she the other woman wouldn’t see her and grabbed a long t-shirt and a pair of flannel bottoms. She crawled into her bed and snuggled under the covers inviting sleep to take her. 

_ “Help!” Henry cried out. JJ tried to run to him, but something was holding her back. She suddenly saw that her feet were trudging through a thick, red liquid, that JJ new to be blood. She saw the blood coming from a bathtub, and she immediately felt sick. She knew the tub. She knew who was inside of it. Rosalyn slowly stood up and joined Henry.  _

_ “Help me. Why won’t you help us?” Rosalyn cried out as her wrists kept bleeding.  _

_ “Save us, mommy. Why can’t you save us?” The harder JJ ran, the farther the two of them got. There was a knot in her throat, and she thought she was going to throw up. She felt a pang of guilt hit her stomach. Why was this happening to them, and why couldn’t she help them. _

_ “I’m coming, don’t worry,” she said frantically. Suddenly they both fell into the pool of blood. She let out a strangled sob and ran to the place where their bodies lied. She held her son’s body in her arms and screamed out into the ether. She screamed and cried for what felt like ages until she heard a familiar voice behind her. _

_ “You did this to us. You weren’t good enough to save us.” Emily said with a cold look on her face. JJ was so shocked she didn’t even respond.  _

_ “How will you save lives if you couldn’t even save us? Where were you when we needed you,” her sister chimed in. _

_ “Where were you, mommy?” Henry finished. Suddenly a man walked up behind Emily and brought a knife to her neck. JJ recognized the man. It was Ian Doyle, the same man that had thrown their lives into utter chaos only a year earlier.  _

_ “NO! EMILY!” she bawled. As the blood of the woman she loved sprayed across her face.  _

Tears streamed down her face until she felt a warm hand on her cheek. Her eyes shot open as she sat up. JJ’s eyes scanned the room, and her pupils adjusted to the darkness. She was hyperventilating, and beads of sweat clung to her forehead. She had tear tracks down her cheeks, and her eyes still stung from the sobbing. A soothing voice brought her out of her fear and confusion.

“It’s just a dream. You were dreaming. It was just a dream.” Emily said, doing her best to calm the blonde. 

She had woken up to hear JJ screaming no, and had instinctively grabbed her gun to protect the two of them when she realized that the younger agent was having a nightmare. So Emily rushed to her side and tried to wake her up. She didn’t want to invade her space, but she wouldn’t just leave JJ to suffer in her subconscious. When JJ cried her name out, Emily couldn’t help but wonder what was haunting the sleeping woman’s mind. Finally, when her eyes fluttered open, and the pain and terror behind them were like gut punches to the darker haired woman. 

JJ started frantically, rambling, “Emily. I-you. I saw you and you were-and Henry and my sister and-oh god Henry-” 

“Jennifer. Hey, I’m okay, Henry is okay. I’m right here I’m not going anywhere,” Emily reassured her. JJ lunged forward into the taller woman’s arms and buried her face into the crook of her neck as she sobbed. Emily was shocked by the gesture, but in a fraction of a second, she tightened her arms around JJ. “I’m right here. I’ve got you, and I’m not going anywhere. I’m never going to leave you.” She whispered promises into disheveled blonde hair until she felt her breathing even out. Emily pressed a kiss to the blonde’s forehead. She suddenly realized the impact the simple action might. She pulled back to apologize, but JJ let out a small whimper, and so Emily returned to soothing the other woman. 

JJ cried until she had no tears, and then she just sat there, shaking in Emily’s arms until she felt the other agent’s lips on her hairline. Abruptly she felt Emily pulling away, and she let out a whine asking her to stay, and she did.

“Can you stay with me while I sleep?” JJ asked quietly. Her voice seemed to break a little more with each word. 

“Yeah. I’ll just be in the other bed if you need anyth-”

“No, I mean…” JJ looked at the wall beside her. She was worried she had overstepped. Of course, Emily was uncomfortable sleeping in the same bed as her. She was about to take back her request when Emily responded.

“Yeah. Yeah, sure,” Emily agreed as she slid under the covers. JJ immediately pressed her body into the side of the brunette’s and hid her face in Emily’s chest. Emily pulled a blanket over the blonde’s shoulders and wrapped her arms around JJ’s waist. Before long, Emily could feel JJ fall asleep. She reached up and brushed a strand of golden locks behind her ear.

“Goodnight, Jayje,” Emily paused for a moment before uttering those three little words that would have rocked JJ’s world if she had heard. “I love you.”


	4. Unsubs and break-ups and bagels oh my.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that this update took so long. School started and I also didn't like my writing so most of it is going to suck, sorry about that.

JJ’s eyes opened to the blaring of Emily’s alarm clock. It was 6:30, and they had to get to the precinct. Memories of the previous night came flooding back to her. Her nightmares were terrible, but they often got worse during cases. But as soon as she was in Emily’s arms, she fell fast asleep; no dreams and no fear, just safety. JJ turned over to find an empty bed, and her heart sank. She glanced around the room when she saw Emily walk out of the bathroom, buttoning the buttons on a blue shirt. JJ’s cheeks turned pink, and her breath hitched as her eyes glided over inches of toned pale skin. She looked down, feeling guilty for objectifying a friend, a coworker.

“Morning, Jayje. Sorry about the alarm,” Emily looked up after finishing the last button, and her face fell. “JJ, are you okay?” She asked, noticing the red tint to the blonde’s cheeks.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just a little tired I guess,” 

“Well, okay,” Emily said, unconvinced but not willing to press the subject, “I guess that makes sense after last night.” JJ nodded and looked down at her hands. They sat in awkward silence for what felt like hours. “The bathroom’s all yours if you need it. I’m going to get some coffee from down the street, and we can drive to the precinct together. Does that sound good?”

“Yeah, that’s fine,” JJ said with a smile. Emily started toward the door and gave one last concerned glance before heading out. JJ let out a shaky breath and walked into the bathroom. She decided she would take a quick shower and meet Emily for that coffee. When she stepped out of the water and got dressed, she realized her hands were still shaking. JJ hated it when this happened. She hated the constant overwhelming crushing fear that something terrible was about to happen. But she pushed past her terror and walked out of the room. 

“How have you never seen Die Hard?” exclaimed Derek, “You know what kid after this case is over, we are having a movie night at my place.” JJ smiled at the boys. At least she knew that if anything terrible were to happen, the team, her real family would be there. Her family would always be there.

“Morning, Reid, Morgan. Did either of you see Prentiss?” JJ greeted them both 

“Yeah, she went down the street to get you some coffee. Is coffee code for something, because this is the second time this week she got you some,” Derek questioned with a smirk.

“Shut up, Morgan,” JJ said as a familiar blush covered her cheeks.

“On March 2nd, in 2009, Emily stated that her love language was food and smiling. She smiles at you, JJ 23% more often than anyone else on this team. 

“Well, the computer has spoken—you two are in love. When’s the wedding?” 

“Morgan, on that same day, you said that your love language is teasing and light banter. You tease Prentiss and me more than anyone else on this team. So with whom are you in love?” Reid said with a smile. Reid wasn’t great with social cues, but when he did this sort of thing to Morgan, everyone enjoyed it. Mainly because it was fun to watch the stoic, bruting, badass that is Derek Morgan blush at the boy genius. JJ laughed and walked away as she heard Reid and Morgan arguing about how Morgan had ‘never said anything like that.’

As JJ rounded the corner of the motel, her phone buzzed and she saw a text from Will and then her phone started ringing. She answered, apprehensive about the conversation she might have with the man on the other line. 

_ “Hey, Jennifer. I need to tell you something,” Will said as JJ answered the phone _

_ “What is it, Will? Is Henry ok?” she asked _

_ “Henry’s alright. But, um, I found a job,” _

_ “Ok,” JJ said, confused as to why Will had to call her about this. _

_ “In New Orleans,” he drawled in his accent. _

_ “Will-” JJ started but Will cut her off. _

_ “I’m going to let you think about it, Jayje, and I will respect any decision you make,”  _ JJ was angry. She was furious. Not because Will was leaving but because she knew Henry needed him. What would they do? Would Henry spend the weekends with Will? Scenarios ran through her head before she responded.

_ “You know I’m not moving with you.” JJ said firmly. Will chuckled a sad laugh _

_ “Yeah, I thought that you were going to say that,”  _ Will said with a soft smile. JJ’s anger started to dissipate and it was replaced with a strange sense of relief,  _ “Could I have done anything?  _

_ “What do you mean,”  _ JJ asked warily

_ “To keep you. Could I ever have meant more to you than her?” Will asked.  _ JJ’s heart skipped a beat. How could Will know about her emotional affair? Could she even call it that? 

“I don’t know what you’re-” Will cut her off again

_ “Jayje, it don’t take a profiler to see it,”  _ JJ paused. She thought about Will and all their time together. They both knew what was happening but decided not to fight it. To be honest she was sad to see it come to an end. 

_ “I guess not. I'm so sorry Will. If I could make things different I would,” _

_ “I know sweetie. I’m not gonna lie, I’m disappointed in how this is turning out but it was really good being with you and you brought me one of the greatest joys of my life. Henry will be okay. The kid knows more than he lets on.” Will said. _

_ “I did- I do love you,” she felt a tear slip down her cheek. It was hard to say goodbye even if it was to welcome something new. _

_ “I love you to Jayje. I always will. So how about I facetime you later and you can say hi to Henry before he goes to bed. _

_ “That sounds really good. Bye, Will,” _

_ “Goodbye, Cher,” She hit the red button at the bottom of her screen to end the call. _

She stared at her cellphone long after the call ended. She wiped away a few tears and raised her head. She saw black hair weaving through the crowd. Emily took one look at her and could tell that something had happened.

“Hey, JJ. Are you okay?” Emily asked, noticing the blonde acting a little strange.

“I think Will and I just broke up,”

“Oh my god. I’m so sorry Jayje. Are you okay.” Emily said with worry and concern written on her face. JJ looked back down at her phone and smiled gently.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m okay. I'm good,” she laughed. Emily was a little confused but decided not to press the topic any further.

“Okay, I got us some iced coffee and breakfast bagels. I was starving,”

“The car is parked back at the motel,” JJ threw her thumb behind her. They started walking back to the motel while eating the bagels. They were in the middle of a meaningless conversation about a movie they had seen when Emily’s phone started ringing. 

“Prentiss. Okay, we’re on our way,” Emily snapped her phone shut and looked at JJ with a grimace. “Another body just dropped. It’s our guy.” 

They finally got to the unmarked black SUV and started for the Precinct. They rode in silence for a few minutes before JJ spoke up.

“Listen, about last night--”

“It’s okay. I have nightmares too. I think we all do. I’m just glad I was there for you.” Emily smiled over at JJ in the passenger seat. It was quiet for another minute until JJ broke the silence again. 

“Are they about Doyle? The nightmares, I mean.” the blonde asked tentatively.

“Most of the time. I had this surgery when I was 15. I have a lot of nightmares about that, too,” Emily said. She couldn’t tell JJ that she had an abortion. The younger woman would probably never look at her the same. They didn’t speak for the rest of the car ride. 

Arrived at the precinct at the same time as Rossi, and so they walked in together. The bullpen was bustling with activity. 

“Carrie Gibs. Dark brown hair. Shot by her seven-year-old son this morning. Her neighbors heard the shot and went over to investigate. By the time the kid opened the door, the unsub had already fled,” Hotch says, briefing the team. 

“Okay, so he’s escalating. He used to take a week between kills, but this was only three days later,” Morgan added. 

“Morgan, you and I will check out the crime scene. Prentiss, JJ interview the witnesses. Reid, you get started on geographical profiling, Rossi, talk to the local law enforcement. Garcia, you with us?” 

“Always boss, and before you ask, I already cross-referenced all my data on the victims and they don’t seem to have many similarities other than the obvious,”

“Ok, thanks, keep looking into everything. I’m going to go make sure they aren’t naming this guy,” Hotch ended the meeting and everyone went out to carry out the task they had. 

When Emily and JJ arrived at the crime scene they saw that the young boy was being talked to by social workers. JJ visibly tensed. Everyone knew that cases with kids hit harder with her. They pushed past the crowd forming around the house. The two walked up behind the social worker and flashed their badges. 

“We need to speak to Michael if that’s alright,” JJ said gently 

“Is it really necessary? He just lost his mother can’t this wait,” the woman urges

“I’m sorry but we need to understand the unsub as quickly as possible,” Emily says

“Hey, Michael. I just have a couple of questions for you. Is that alright?” JJ asked, plastering a fake smile on her face. The young boy nodded. “Did you see the face of the man that came into your house,” 

“Yes. But I don’t remember exactly what he looked like. He was wearing a blue shirt with words on it and his belt had lots of tools” the little boy responded.

“Can you tell me if he was angry when he came in?” JJ asked, trying to gage the unsubs motives.

“No, not really. He was crying when he gave me the…” he trailed off. New tears streamed down his cheeks.

“That’s all thank you,” JJ looked at the woman standing over Michael. She knelt back down and Emily eyed her warily. “We’re going to catch the man that hurt your mom,” JJ paused. Emily shook her head, knowing what was about to spill out of the blonde's mouth but JJ didn’t care. She knew she shouldn’t say it but all rationality went out the window. “We’re going to get him, I promise,” 

Emily let out an exasperated sigh. Emily didn’t have a lot of rules when it came to the job but the number one unspoken law about working a case was that you never promise the victims’ family. 

“Jennifer. We have to go talk to the other families,” JJ’s head snapped up. Emily rarely ever called her Jennifer. She stood up and the two of them walked to the SUV. Emily knew that she was irrationally upset and that she was probably projecting her anger. She looked across the car at JJ and shook her head.

“What Emily? What has you so worked up?” JJ said halfway through the car ride.

“You never make promises you can’t be sure you can keep. Everyone knows that. It’s dangerous and it gives a sense of false hope,”

“We’re gonna catch this guy Em. Even if I have to do it alone,”

“You don’t get to make that call,”

“And neither do you.” JJ snapped, raising her voice. Emily clenched her jaw but focused on the road ahead of them. The blonde immediately regretted being so rude and her eyes started to shimmer with unshed tears so she turned to look out the window. They stayed silent the rest of the car ride was silent. 

They decided to interview the rest of the family members separately and turned up with nothing new. As they drove back to the precinct the air was filled with tension. Luckily a call from Reid and Rossi helped. 

“We’re pretty sure we know that he lives in the area. He doesn’t make an effort to hide his face and he kills where he lives so he probably isn’t afraid of getting caught,” Rossi said.

“Okay, thanks. We think he has some sort of uniform for his job and that’s what gets him into these houses. We’ll talk more when we get to the station.” As they drove they both felt like speaking up but neither had the guts.

“He seems pretty disorganized. He doesn’t leave much of a signature other than making the kids do it.” Morgan said once everyone was gathered in front of Reid’s map.

“He’s replacing a woman that he thinks wronged him with these victims. He’s taking back the power he never had as a child with these young boys. He’s making other boys do what he wishes he had.” Hotch stated

“A classic control seeker,” Rossi said matter-of-factly. They kept talking for another hour when they decided to head back to the motel. 

“JJ,” Rossi called out.

“Yeah. What’s up Dave?”

“I just wanna make sure that whatever is happening between you and Prentiss won’t affect your performance in the field,”

“What do you mean?” ‘Did the whole team think they were dating?’ JJ asked herself. It seemed that way. 

“You two seem to be upset with each other. I’m just clarifying that you will remain professional,”

“I- of course,” JJ turned to walk away when the senior agent spoke again.

“I know that I of all people probably am not qualified to give this kind of advice, but you should tell her how you feel,” JJ smiled at the ground 

“Yeah, a lot of people have told me that, thank you,” JJ walked toward her rental and drove off to the motel. When she arrived she felt her phone buzz and saw Will’s contact appear. She smiled knowing she would see Henry.

“Hey buddy,” she said as she answered.

“Mommy!” Henry squealed excitedly “Did you catch the bad guy?” 

“Not yet. But we’re really close. I’m gonna be home soon,” The three of them talked for the rest of the night despite the time difference. By the time it was Henry’s bedtime Emily had ordered some take out. They still hadn’t spoken a word to each other.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have been such an ass earlier,” JJ said as Emily poured over a case file.

The brunette’s head snapped up and she swallowed the mouthful of Chinese she had in her mouth. She shook her head.

“No. I’m sorry. It really wasn’t a big deal I shouldn’t have gotten so upset.” Emily said with watery eyes. JJ opened her mouth to speak when her phone started ringing.

“Hey, what’s up Morgan?” J said as she answered the phone. “What do you mean. Another one. It hasn't even been a day. Oh my god. Okay, we’re on our way.”

“What happened? Is everything okay?” Emily asked frantically 

“He killed again, and he took the kid this time,”

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Emily and JJ like iced coffee cause they're gay. (just a joke)


	5. Someone call a wi wo van

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg guys I am so sorry this took so long. I have been swamped with school and mental health stuff. I promise this work isn't abandoned. I love you all and here is another poorly written chapter. Also, Don't be upset about the end.

They arrived at the station in a hurry knowing that they needed to find this young boy. They quickly went over the profile and tried to track down any leads but came up empty-handed.

“His mother's name was Allison Barret and our kidnapped victim is 8-year-old Daniel Barret,” Rossi said to the team as he flipped through a file for the fifth time. 

“What are we miss’in man. We gotta be miss’in something,” Derek exclaimed with a strain in his voice. All of a sudden Morgan’s phone started to buzz. 

“Hey, sugar mama, spoil me,” Derek said into the phone. Everyone in the precinct looked at him confused. 

“Well after Emily gave us the description of the uniform I went through and looked at the victimology. They had all purchased a TV recently before they were killed. The TVs were all from different companies but I chased the lead anyway. So it turns out they all used the same handyman service. The house calls are handled by Andrew Curman and Nicky Costello. Turns out Nicky was put in the foster system when he was 15 after his mom verbally and psychologically abused him. Nicky has a few sexual harassment charges and one aggravated assault,”

“That’s great baby girl. You got an address for us,” Derek said, ignoring the raised eyebrows he was receiving from the surrounding officers.

“Do you even have to ask? 2187 Finn Street, it’s a small ranch on the outskirts of town,”

“Okay, that’s our guy. Thank’s Garcia. Let’s go,” Hotch said. They all threw on a bulletproof vest and got into unmarked, armored cars with two S.W.A.T. teams trailing behind them. Emily bit her nails in anticipation. She was terrified. But not of the impending raid on the ranch. She was terrified at the prospect of JJ being single again. This made it a lot harder for Emily to bury and ignore her feelings for the blonde. Avoiding her seemed like the only option which is why the brunette had consciously decided to ride in a separate SUV than the object of her affection.

In a separate car, JJ was nervous out of her mind. She was about to find a child on this ranch. Whether he was going to be alive was her main concern. She didn’t think she would be able to look her son in the eyes if this little boy died on her watch. All JJ needed was some comfort which she would normally find in Emily, but the brunette seemed to be avoiding her. JJ tried not to think about it but she knew she couldn’t face the horrors of her job without her best friend. 

“Hey, we’re about to pull up,” Spencer’s calming voice pulled JJ from her thoughts and she jumped at the feeling of his warm hand on her shoulder. “Are you ok JJ?” 

“Yeah, Spence. Just lost up here,” She responded, gesturing to her head. Spencer nodded, not convinced but deciding not to break the rule on profiling coworkers. Spencer had always had a small crush on JJ but more recently his feelings for a certain broad-shouldered agent had become apparent. 

The SUV’s pulled up to a dirt path outside the ranch in pitch-black darkness. The team quietly stepped out of the cars and stalked towards the big red house. 

_ Such a cliche _ thought JJ. A serial killer living in a creepy barn in the middle of nowhere. She glanced around at her friends and shook her head when she saw Reid. He had an awful posture and always held his gun like it was too heavy for him. 

As the team neared the house Emily’s heart started to race. Suddenly a huge light lit up the field they were standing in. And a man walked out with an automatic rifle. He was wearing denim jeans and a sweater. He had a neatly trimmed beard and a strong build. The man was holding the boy by his collar and waving the rifle around. He looked angry and disheveled as if he hadn’t slept in days. 

“Nicholas Costello?” Hotch asked, already knowing the answer.

“Don’t come any closer,” Nick screamed at them.

“Put the gun down Nicky. We can work something out. That boy didn’t do anything to you.” Emily said with a calm voice.

“No. You’re just like her. You’re all just like her.” The unsub yelled frantically. He moved the gun from the boy’s head to the team of armed agents. Emily flinched and lowered her gun. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Morgan making his way towards the unsub.

“What are you doing Em?” Jj asked, terrified. “Are you crazy?” 

“I look like his mother, so he might listen to me,” Emily responded. “Listen, Nicky, your mother is gone,” 

“No, they’re all awful. He’s just like me. I have to save him.” Nick said frantically. His eyes were a mix of anguish and sadness. Emily slowly walked towards the unsub, despite her better judgment. 

“If u need to save him then let him go.” Nicky’s grip on the boys loosened and Emily took a few more steps towards the unsub.

“I will. I will save him,” Nicky said as he pushed the boy to the ground in front of Emily. “I’ll save him from you,” he snarled 

Emily’s eyes widened as she realized what was happening. Everything seemed to slow down as Jj watched as Nick opened fire on the line of armed men, including her team. The bullets ripped through the air and she faintly heard Hotch yell to get cover. The blond wanted to run towards the unsub but her legs wouldn't respond. Everything happened in a matter of minutes but it felt like an eternity. The firing ceased as Morgan pounced on the unsub from behind. When the ringing in Jj’s ears stopped she rushed towards the child huddled on the ground.

“Are you okay Daniel? Did he hurt you?” Jj asked gently as she slid to the ground. The boy shook his head and started sobbing. “Hey, it’s ok sweetie. I got you,” she said as she enveloped him in a tight embrace. 

As the boy’s breath evened she heard a faint voice behind her.

“Hey, guys. So I might have a small prob-,” Emily’s strained voice was cut off as her knees crumpled beneath her. She saw Jj lunge forward and catch her limp body before it hit the ground. There was a white-hot searing pain stabbing into her abdomen and hot sticky liquid pooling beneath her vest. A black fuzz started clouding her vision and her head began to fall back the blond caught it and held it up.

“Hey, hey, hey, you're ok. Stay with me Em. Your gonna be just fine. JJ soothingly reassured her.

As Emily tried to open her eyes wider she took in all that JJ was. In her delirious state, the younger women looked almost angelic. Her bright blond hair was all pushed to one side of her face. And her bright blue eyes shone with concern. It took everything in Emily’s being not to lean up and kiss her right there. 

Jj’s hands were shaking as she felt the blood spilling out into her palm. She quickly unclipped the bulletproof vest and slid it off of the brunette in her arms. She ripped open Emily’s black button up. Her breath hitched as her eyes glided over perfect pale skin and stopped on the sticky red liquid spread across the older agent's stomach. Hotch and Morgan ran over with Reid close behind. Hotch started applying pressure and Morgan pulled Jj off of Emily and made her look at him. 

“Jj. Jj! Hey, look at me. She is gonna be ok.” Derek said tenderly with soft eyes.

“I know. She- she- she has to be. I can’t do this without her.”


	6. Should you write cheating death under experience or hobbies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I'm sorry this took so long. I'm not really sure where I was going with this chapter but here ya go.

“Will you sit down,” Morgan pleaded with Jj. She didn’t seem to notice and continued pacing across the linoleum floor of the hospital waiting room. Her mind raced with the possibilities. 

It had been more than 4 hours since they had shown up at the hospital. The whole team had been in the waiting room and Garcia bought a plane ticket the second she heard the news. 

“JJ!” Morgan exclaimed a little louder than he had intended. The blonde woman’s head whipped around to stare at him teary-eyed. His eyes softened as she swallowed a sob. JJ looked around at her team. Hitch sat up straight and looked at his watch, Rossi read a magazine and Reid bounced his leg up and down as he tapped his thumbs together. She let out a deep sigh and walked over to the chairs and sat down. Suddenly her eyelids felt much heavier and she closed them over her bright blue irises. 

Reid watched as JJ drifted in and out of consciousness. She deserved a break and everyone knew it. As he pulled his attention from his tired colleague, he noticed another stand-up. It was Morgan and Reid followed him with his eyes as he walked around a corner. After 189 seconds (he counted) the youngest agent decided to go find him. He walked down the hallways till he came to an ornate wooden door labeled  _ Prayer Room.  _ Spencer stood there for a moment before deciding to enter the room. When he did, he found the older agent sitting on a bench with his eyes closed, chin resting on his laced fingers. Slowly, Reid walked to sit beside him and look up at the painting in front of them. He thought about the last time they were in a situation like this. When Garcia was shot, or when Emily had “died”. He closed his eyes for what felt like an eternity until he felt the weight next to him shift. His eyes opened as he felt a large strong hand hold his own. 

“She’ll pull through pretty boy. She always does,” Derek said reassuringly.

“I know, I just hate waiting,” 

“I just don’t understand how it went through her—,”

“That doesn’t matter right now, Derek,” Reid said softly. Morgan’s head spun around at hearing his first name.

“Your right,” Derek said with a sigh

“I always am,” Reid stated with an irresistibly cute smirk

“Oh shut up,” Morgan chuckled. It took everything not to pull the smaller boy into a tight embrace and cry, but he had cried enough. He cried so much on this job he couldn’t do it now. It was painful and sometimes unbearable. But he knew that his team would be there. That Spencer would be there and so he didn’t cry.

JJ was a very different story. Every time she closed her eyes she saw Emily. Emily in all her captivating glory being ripped from their world. She couldn’t stand it. Not after everything she had already lost. 

JJ opened her eyes to look up at the clock. It was nine o’clock in the morning. She couldn’t believe that they had been there for six hours. Six hours she had spent waiting and watching. She leaned back in her chair and felt tears prick the corners of her eyes, but she blinked them away. 

Suddenly, the glass doors of the emergency room swung open, and a pair of bright yellow kitten heels with fishnets sticking out of them strode through the door. JJ stood up to greet Garcia. She was wearing a plaid navy dress that went down to her knees and a black cardigan. She looked as though she had been crying but her makeup was still flawless. Garcia wrapped JJ in a tight embrace and stroked her back soothingly.

“Oh, you poor baby,” Garcia said as she pulled back from the hug, still keeping her hands on the other woman’s shoulders. “I’ve been worried sick I can only imagine how you’ve been. Come on let’s sit down and we can talk about it.” 

The pair walked towards a row of hospital chairs and sat down. JJ rested her chin on her thumbs as she pressed her lips to her laced fingers. Garcia put her hand on JJ’s thigh and turned to look at her. 

“What happened my lovely?” the analyst questioned. 

“I’m not really sure. Emily was trying to stop Nick when he just started shooting in some kind of last-ditch effort to win. Em was really close to him so the bullet went through her vest. She just--She just collapsed and--I don’t know Penelope it all just happened so fast and I don’t know if I--I froze Pen--I froze and--

“Hey, it’s ok Jayje,” Garcia said, completely shifting in her chair. “It doesn’t matter what you did because Emily will be ok,”

“I know.”

“You...do?”

“Yeah,” JJ said softly, “I know she will be because I haven’t told her yet,” Garcia raised an eyebrow and smirked. “Don’t look at me like that I’m serious,” JJ half muttered half laughed.

“I know what you mean but, I’ve heard you tell her that you love her a million times,”

“I’ve said that I love her, but I’ve never said that I’m in love with her,” JJ said as she turned to look back at the wall. 

“I thought that might have been what you meant. Well, do you know where my chocolate muscle man is?” Garcia asked with a glint to her eye

“He and Reid left. They’re probably in the prayer room. You should go find them they would be happy to see you,”

“If you’re sure,” Garcia said, trying to give JJ a choice despite already walking in their direction. 

JJ walked back over to the side of the waiting room where Hotch and Rossi had remained seated. They waited another 45 minutes before a tall man in his mid 40’s wearing teal scrubs walked in.”

“Family of Emily Prentiss?” The man asked as he looked around the room. Hotch, Rossi, and JJ stood and looked at the man.

“Hi, I’m doctor Norman. The bullet perforated the lung but we were able to reinflate it. Because the bullet went through her vest there was a lot of shrapnel and we were able to remove all but one piece. She has a long process ahead of her but with support, she should make a full recovery.” 

JJ let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding. It felt like a weight had been lifted off her chest and she could breathe again. A relieved smile spread across her face.

“When can we see her?” Rossi asked in an almost frantic tone

“She should be good for one or two visitors at a time but don’t send the entire team in there.” The doctor responded

“Thank you,” Hotch said in a monotone voice, staring the doctor down. He smiled awkwardly and walked away.

“I’ll go find Reid and the rest of them,” Rossi said.

“Do you want to go see her?” Hotch questioned. His face was still cold and emotionless but she could see the kindness in his eyes. 

“You heard the doctor. I wouldn’t want to take anyone else's time with her,”

“So that’s a yes,”

“What? Hotch I-”

“Just go in there. It’ll calm your nerves.”

“Ok,” JJ said. She smiled gently and she could have sworn that she saw him smile back.

Her hand shook as she brought it up to turn the doorknob. JJ pushed the door open slowly and carefully. Her feet seemed stuck at their spot in the door frame but she willed them to move forward. When she finally walked through the door her eyes fell to the sleeping woman. There was an IV and an EKG hooked up to her. JJ usually hated the loudness of hospitals. Especially the rhythmic beeping of EKG monitors. But this time it was music to her ears. This Time it meant something. It meant that the woman lying in front of her was alive and so she couldn’t think of a better sound to fill the room. Except maybe My Chemical Romance.

JJ sat down in the chair next to the hospital bed. The room smelled like bleach stained floors and death. Emily’s raven hair was spilling out onto the pillow and her long eyelashes looked so delicate resting on her cheeks. She was gorgeous and JJ knew it. 

“Hey, so they sent me in first. I’m not really sure what to say to you, but I’m here. I hope you know that. I’m here and I’m not gonna leave you. You got shot and your blood is still covering my shirt and I had to wash it off my hands and you almost died and now you have a piece of metal in your chest and I’m not really sure what I’m saying but I’m still here.” JJ sucked in a deep breath before continuing. “I’ll be here through it all. This recovery is gonna be shit but I’m here,” The younger woman slipped her hand into Emily’s and looked at her for another minute. The corners of her mouth curled up ever so slightly as she stood up. She turned to walk away when she felt a light squeeze around her fingers. Her head whipped around to find Emily’s eyes half open with a gentle smile plastered on her face.

“Goodmorning Jayje.Your shirt looks like shit?” Emily laughed with a rasp to her voice. 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna try (emphasis on try) to update once a week but who knows. Lemme know what you think. Criticism is welcome but don't be too harsh. Thanks for reading.


End file.
